May | 2016

30 May

Accepting Who You Are

Accepting who you are is a step towards learning to love yourself. It is human nature to look at our own flaws and hold ourselves to standards that we would never expect others to live up to. In counselling a common theme is being unhappy with one self and judging. If you don’t like you then why expect others to? It seems simple but we tend to make it complicated. Accept yourself and be your own best friend. If you are happy and caring to yourself then others are attracted to that energy.

In article Therapists Spill: 12 Ways to Accept Yourself, they suggest you identify and set your intention. Intending to self nourish and celebrate your strengths and honestly embrace your vulnerability is a stepping stone to your new relationship with yourself.

Self Acceptance is about letting go of who you want to be or think you should be and just being. There are steps we can take to be kinder and more loving of ourselves. We can take action and move towards change and healthy improvements to our own self care and self concept. On the blog Tiny Buddha, author Jasmin Tanjeloff writes about Accepting and Loving Ourselves in 10 Simple Steps.

In 8 Techniques for Self-Acceptance, author Leo Babuta suggests that our “happiness is determined by our level of self acceptance.” Compassion and forgiveness for yourself is an important technique to practice. Let go of old grudges and forgive yourself for being human.

So to get started, begin your day with a positive affirmation or a short meditation. This is simple but it reminds you everyday how you can make a difference by setting your intent and making it a positive one.

Affirmations should include a positive statement about yourself. Something like I love and accept myself without question. Here’s a short meditation (2 min) from Depak Chopra, A Positive Affirmation and Acceptance. A little longer one (16 min) is excellent to focus on something your don’t like about yourself and expose that thought in a guided meditation for self acceptance

17 May

How to Use Mindfulness Everyday

This month I was lucky enough to be able to attend a Mindfulness workshop. The workshop didn’t teach me any earth shattering new ideas but it did make me a better therapist. I am at a time in my life where my mind is very busy with a number of things that are quite frankly out of my control and not of my creation. Taking a day to be with other like minded professionals in a positive environment and practice mindfulness was quite frankly a fantastic gift!

I left feeling relaxed, void of negative thoughts and thinking about how I could use it more in my own practice with clients. Fast forward a bit and I now have an arsenal of handouts, apps and links to provide clients with the tools they need to be mindful.

It only seemed to make sense to share a little of my research with everyone. The number one question is where to start? Start small and build from there. There is no right or wrong, no judgement. Freeing your mind from judgement if only for a minute is a much kinder way to treat ourselves. Take a look at Three Simple Mindfulness Practices You Can Use Everyday.

Try a 3 minute body scan which will help ground you and be more present. My new favourite is a 5 minute Chocolate Meditation, it is wonderful and calorie free! It does make me want to go find chocolate though.

If you find yourself wanting to know more about Mindfulness and Meditation we have a very good collection of resources on the Lidkea Stob Pinterest page. On our Meditation board you will find links to additional meditations, articles on the benefits of meditation and a few tips on how to get started. Our Mindfulness board has explanations of mindfulness and activities your can try such as a mindfulness walk or mindful coloring pages.

10 May

Let’s Talk About Sleep

Sleep is a powerful thing. If it is restful and restorative we wake up feeling like we can conquer the world, or at least the busy day ahead of us. At times when we don’t get enough or we have poor quality sleep, we can feel exhausted and less confident about our own abilities. The day seems to drag on and all we can think about is crawling under the covers at the end of our day.

There are a number of things that can impact the quality of our sleep. A busy mind, menopause and stress are the top three that people often talk to their counsellors about.

Perimenopause or menopause is something that is whispered about in the lunch room. The change in hormone levels can bring hot flashes, irritability, anxiety and insomnia. Interrupted sleep at this time in a woman’s life is very common. Author Sheryl Kraft, Is Menopause Playing Havoc With Your Sleep? addresses the fact that there is no one size fits all solution. We are all uniquely different and trying different solutions will help you have a more restful night. Suggestions she makes are to avoid caffeine after 2:00 p.m, keep your bedroom dark, incoporate some exercise in your day and eat a high carbohydrate snack such as a whole grain cracker with a small amount of healthy protein before bed.

If after trying a few of these changes you do no find success you may wish to speak to a naturopathic doctor and they will listen to your specific concerns and will tailor a plan just for you. Many benefit plans now cover naturopathic appointments.

A busy mind is common in menopause and also when under stress. In an article from Pick the Brain they provide 5 Strategies to Empty Your Mind Before Bed. Keeping a notebook beside your bed can become a nighttime ritual that will help you prepare for your new day tomorrow but also to free yourself from the perpetual “to do” list. Write down what is on your mind whether it is your grocery list or the things that might be bothering you. Think about them and then release them for the day and you can pick them up again the next day if you need to.

In 12 Ways to Shut Off Your Brain Before Bedtime they suggest practicing relaxation exercises. Visualization exercises, meditation or a short evening yoga practice can help set the stage for sleep. If stress if still a barrier to catching the rest you need, then seeing a counsellor to help explore what the issues further and create a plan together.

Try making the last thought before bed one thing you are grateful for from your day. Set your intention to be a positive one for the next day.

Tools to Help Sleep

Yoga Nidra for Sleep, A 22 Minute guided meditation for sleep.

Bedtime Yoga for Deep Sleep, 6:36 minutes of bedtime yoga flow that can done on your bed.

Yoga for Better Sleep, 10 minute yoga routine for better sleep.

Into Sleep, A 10 minute guided meditation from Quiet Mind Cafe to promote a deep restorative sleep

Free Guided Meditations from UCLA Health, Try the mindful body scan

Naturopaths in Niagara

Dr. Stephen Tripodi, ND Optimal Wellness Niagara

Dr. Jane Lauermeier, 905-935-6460

Dr. Laura Imola, WIN Health Solutions

Dr. Charlene Kush, Niagara’s Elite Wellness Spa

02 May

Believe in the positive

Every day we make choices on how we are going to respond to things. It can be a change at work, something someone said or just a fleeting thought. We decide whether to think positively or negatively. Sometimes when we are anxious or feeling down our minds go to the negative thought more readily.

In counselling we look at the concept that for every negative thought there is a positive one. What would the outcome be if we chose to believe in possibilities and opportunities? When we close the door on a negative thought we open the door to options. In a Huff Post article they took a look at the science behind positive thinking. A negative thought can take over your life but positive thoughts create positive emotions such as joy and contentment. This sounds like a much better option.

A few years ago I had the opportunity to see Dr. Wayne Dyer speak. His positive energy and motivation is something I will never forget as it seemed to linger with me for weeks after seeing him. His book Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life is still a mainstay on my recommended reading list. He asked audience members to think about their dreams and aspirations and what was holding them back. One audience member said they wanted to start their own business but she couldn’t do so for financial reasons. His response was to suggest that the barrier was a mental construct, a barrier that stopped her from achieving her dream. What if she were to say “I am going to start a business” and just believed in the possibility? Two ways of thinking….one a dead end with the only option being failure and the other with the power of possibility.

If you aren’t sure where to start, take a minute from your day and think about something that didn’t go well or made you think negatively. Stop and think about what the alternative positive thought might be and write it down. Do this every day for a week and take a look at your list at the end of the week. Was this hard or did it start to come easier as the week went on? Keep a note book by your bed or jot it down on your phone. The idea is that your brain will start to welcome the changes in thinking and you will find yourself making room for the positive and what a wonderful way to believe that things can be different.